All change.
Today I received word that I have been offered a place on the Bournemouth University MSc Computing (Software Engineering) course. So, I had to say goodbye all of a sudden to my Social Work masters coursemates at Brighton Uni. After an announcement to the group very briefly today in person, here's the mail I sent out to them that covers what the change is all about.
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Hello Year 2,
I thought I'd better write after my surprise course departure. Don't mean to be rude. There wasn't much opportunity to be able to speak to you all individually, and I didn't want to make to much of a deal of it.
I didn't even know myself until lunchtime today what the year ahead was going to be for me. Obviously, I have been thinking a lot, talking to people, careers advisers, friends, family, Lindsay and Jem, all about where I am, what I want, what makes sense, and where to go next. I didn't speak to many of you about my decision-making because I wanted to be sure before it became common-knowledge.
It's not been an easy decision. The conclusion was, however, that I am choosing what makes sense to me in terms of the kind of person I am and the place I can feel most secure and interested. I come from A-levels and Uni courses of Maths, Sciences and Philosophy. After that I felt it was time to branch out and go get a hands on feel for making something practically worthwhile in the world. And I did. Fast-forward a few years of work, travel and volunteering and I wanted to still build on what I had been doing since leaving uni and that was professional and challenging. Hence, social work.
But.... it's not where I'm happy. I will forever be, it seems, the over-analyst and am most happy when solving problems and puzzles. Mainly ones that aren't complicated in the fuzziness of the human condition. Also, my interest in social work was mainly as an idealist - wanting to make a positive difference in my 9-5 work. I was never so naive as to think this wouldn't be without massive compromise to practicalities (money and mixed intentions of others). I also like to be able to do things well and get them done, in social work what is 'done well' is a matter of very mixed degree and the work itself can rarely if ever be really 'done' and finished.
So, I'm going back to the roots of my interests, and learning how things work, solving problems, being creative in those solutions and being able to produce completed work I can be proud of. I'm off to Bournemouth University to do a masters (1 year + 1 year paid work placement) in Computing (Software Engineering). And, no, it's not all clicking and typing.
As for the comparative lack of human-relations work - I figure I can do my bit through (a) volunteer work as I have done in the past if I want to, (b) just being a good friend to my best friends and (c) work on being the best bloody boyfriend and (maybe someday) dad I can be.
I am much happier in being able to learn all kinds of geeky things about programming, technology developments and software solutions than I have been in reading about necessarily broad social theories and research.
I'm a quantitivist/scientist in my head and need that from my day-to-day work, I think, to be happy. I'll keep my qualitivist heart for my family, friends and partner.
As for you guys, I will miss you, you clever, sensitive lot. You've just the right balance of cynicism and optimism to do really well as social workers, and I hope you do all reach that goal for yourselves. It's been a tough year, but a fun one when we were able to work together and occasionally moan together. Nothing like a good grumble.
It may feel like I'm just one rat jumping off a sinking ship at the moment, but this rat isn't abandoning disaster, he's smelt bigger cheese. Um, that metaphor kind of fell apart. Point being, dissertation crush aside, I'm sure you'll get through bruised but proud and I wish you all the very best. I'm going to have to write another dissertation anyway, and it'll be full of 'boring' numbers and symbols - so I don't escape that responsibility.
Good bye and good luck to you all,
Mark
